Parents have a gazillion balls to juggle these days with little time for their own self care. Needless to say, it is important for parents to manage their time wisely. This often includes helping children and adolescents do the same. And in the process of helping our youngsters, it is vital to teach them how to become increasingly mindful- especially with the things that we no longer should have to.
Many times when kids are finished with meals they dash back to their previous activities. And typically parents will give them a gentle reminder to clear their plate as they go while other parents may have expectations that they help further with cleanup efforts. Once the expectations and routines are established, parents would be well served to teach their kids to be more mindful of these various responsibilities in their lives. For instance, constantly reminding your forgetful child to bring his plate over to the sink has a very different message than asking him, "What do you need to do before returning to playing? Even though it would be more convenient to skip this step and simply tell them what to do, it is in the question rather that the statement that develops the seeds of mindfulness. If kids never have to think for themselves because their parents are constantly managing their lives, they will choose mental complacency simply because it is the path of least resistance.
Parents simply need to challenge their adolescents to become aware of their responsibilities by asking questions to get their kids to think, plan, organize and take action. There is no better place to practice than in the home and no better place to observe the beauty of your child's development.
Bryon Remo, M.Ed., LMFT
Bryon Remo is a licensed marital and family therapist practicing in Southbury, West Hartford, Watertown, Oxford, Monroe, Seymour, Naugatuck and other surrounding communities.
