It's amazing how some kids can fail repeatedly at some tasks and seem not only unfazed by their failure but appear motivated by it. And yet others who face the slightest resistance are ready to throw in the towel. Bryon Remo, M.Ed., LMFT, licensed marriage and family therapist in Southbury, Connecticut notes that each child has a certain level of resiliency that is not always easy to understand. Yet resiliency can be promoted for those that seem to possess very little.
Children engaged in activities that are competitive often depict a broad range of behaviors at the hands of defeat. Some are completely indifferent, while others agonize over games that have nothing of consequence attached to it. Remo notes that it is important to teach kids to view failure as healthy and essential to growth. Too often adolescents grow up expecting to win at everything not realizing that success takes a lot of hard work.
Building resiliency in kids means giving kids an opportunity to make sense of the missing ingredients that may promote their success. Bryon Remo's work as a therapist with young people often centers around teaching children to reframe their view of failure as an opportunity for later success. He suggests that kids need to be taught to be graceful at losing, but to also benefit from their sadness.
Bryon Remo, M.Ed., LMFT practices in Southbury and West Hartford, CT and serves the communities of Watertown, Oxford, Naugatuck, Monroe,Woodbury, Seymour, Thomaston, Torrington, Roxbury, Bridgewater, Brookfield and Danbury, Connecticut.
