Oftentimes the "identified patient" in therapy continues to feel like a patient until he is able to see and believe that he is not the only one with problems in the family. Many times irate parents enter into a therapeutic relationships purging all their concerns about their angry, stubborn and shiftless teen. When a therapist is able to take a closer look at the role of the IP's siblings it can help redistribute some of the experienced anxiety in therapy to other members, thus making the purpose of treatment feel more balanced. Teens often feel backed into a corner from the onset, dodging bullets and making counter-claims that their parents are equally at fault for whatever they've been charged with. Having siblings in varying dyadic interactions engage in therapy can take on a different feel that can often be more productive than a teen trying to hold his own in a family forum. Teens do not like to put on stage when the energy is focused on their wrong-doing. Their pressing need to hold face and not be shown up is important for them to maintain their self-image. Having siblings discuss ways that they all can problem-solve together can allow heavy conversation to feel more manageable and prevent inevitable defensiveness in a paradigm that is often set up for them to "lose." When siblings are able to engage in a collaborative effort, they can move away from a blame-game approach to one in which they are working together for a shared benefit. This can then be shared with their parents as a means of avoiding the "black sheep" temptation.
No comments:
Post a Comment